Best Rack in Hollywood

I know boobs. I've been married 4 times, two with naturals, two with synthetics. I have known in my years probably a dozen women out of over 60 who sported implants, saline and silicon. This does not count hundreds of strippers who have dangled their protuberances inches from my face. Some were candid enough to talk to me about their experiences with implants. Now I can say that in my experience, some were magnificent, others were encapsulated monstrocities. If you don't know encapsulation, it is when scar tissue forms around the implant, the bodies attempt to isolate the implant from the rest of the body. A defense mechanism of sorts. It results in the implant being compressed into a hard ball like mass. Nasty. I was involved with one gal who had badly encapsulated implants and I doubt she could sleep on her stomach. The things rolled around her chest like two softballs under her skin. Her aureoles were stretched tight like two henna tattoos. Saline implants are the moste real feeling, but in my experience it depends on how much breast the gal has to work with in the beginning, and whether she goes bonkers with the cup size.This results inExhibit A for Synthetic detection: Cantalope breasts. These are the high and tight half melons sitting unnaturally on the gals chest. Dead give aways. If the skin is stretched so tight it looks to pop, Synthetics. This comes from squeezing a C cup implant into A cup skin.It also results in weird nipple placement. Do they point east and west when she is facing North?Do they sit up when she is laying down? Yeah, right. An example of this is Pam Anderson. She used to be a C, max. Now she is a DD and I think resorts to wearing fake nipples. Other examples are too numerous to count: Brittany Murphy, Jessica Alba et al Another cause of this is encapsulation or capsular contractions. Vivica A Fox is a good example of this. Docs don't know why some gals are prone to it and some not. This can also lead to:Exhibit B: Distorted or transplanted aureoles . Anna Nicole Smith is a prime example.Her aureoles are nearly pentagonal due to them having to be moved to accomodate the large implants she got in her Houston stripper days.Another result of Exhibit A isExhibit C: Stretch marks with no history of excessive weight gain. Now let me explain. Why would a young woman without any history of being fat or having had kids have stretch marks on her breasts? Simple the skin couldn't stretch over the one or two cup size too large implants she picked out. Examples are Tara Ried, Salma Hayek, and a close look a some photos of Scarlett will show tell tale stretch marks forming on her left globe.Exhibit D: No visible means of support. Do those C and D cupers defy gravity? Well, natural home grown fat don't act that way. Sharon Sharandon has a first class pair and I've only seen her in one or two movies where her globes were swinging free and you could tell they were the real coconut.Exhibit E: Point of entry. Well this one you have to see the gal nude. The best point of entry is under the fold of the breast. If done right it is undetectable. My current future Ex defys me in this regard. I can not see where her scar is. I encountered a nightmarish set of boobs after a date in the late 80's. She had just had surgery and was so proud of them she pulled her blouse off as soon as we stepped into her apartment after dinner. What greeted my eyes were two conical mostrosities, with bright livid red scars about 3 inches long maybe 4 about 1/3 the way up the curve of her breast. The Doctor a hack, had obvously underestimated how low her needed to make the incision. I hope she got her money back. The other horrible point of entry is throught the aureole. The Doc who suggested that must have been gay. The scar will always be visible, always. It does result in loss of sensitivity in the nipple. The Doc would have to be gay not to know that the first thing the guy looks at is the nipple, and the scar says HEY LOOK AT ME!! Event in the heavily airbrushed men's mags you can see the scars. An example is Gena Lee Nolan. Hers look nice in clothes but sliced and diced in the nude.Exhibit F: Strange folds Just like Exhibit A, undersizing can lead to weird results. I dated a cherokee gal in Oklahoma, a true beauty. I first met her with her future Federal Inmate drug smuggling boyfriend at a christmas party. I was taken with her Ds at that moment. A year or so later I met her again cruising a club and one thing led to another. Seems her boyfriend had been sent up for trafficing when his airplane had to put down with a full load. Anyway when I finally unveiled her two torpedos I noticed that in certain reposes she had a frightful looking fold of skin at the end of each breast. Totally unnoticable in clothes, it was excess skin. Her implants were too small to fill the available realestate. That plus the fact the Doc had gone in through the aureole left something you'd expect to find on the Bride of Frankenstein.Exhibit G: Breast Bone contrast. If the gal has a nice big pair, don't expect to see the outline of her breastbone where her cleavage should be. It just does not happen. If she has enough fat on her to sport a nice round pair and not twin skin bags then you won't see her breast bone. Period.In some instances the Sythetics come loose and hang like the Water balloons on Belushi's chest in the SNL routine. This makes it more noticable. I saw what looked like a former stripper at a department store wearing a tank top. Her massive DDs were down to her belly and the skin of her pects look to be ready to tear. And she wasn't heavy, pretty slim actually, but those DDs were just hanging by the skin of her chest. Examples of this are Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox. Both in my guestimation had under the breast point of entry, because they both still sport nice nipple erections on occassion. Courtney's post prego appearance in The Longest Yard is a tribute to how good implants can look with a little higher body fat percentage. Her's looke stupendous and were shown off to great effect. I though I was looking into the Grand Canyon. Vertigo anyone?Exhibit H: Over and under inflation. I mean how dumb do they think we are? They want us to look, but then they think we won't notice? I am of course referring to the rapid inflation and deflation of the bustline. Laura San Giacomo, Pam Anderson, Sigurney Weaver, and on and on.Laura's bustline exploded on Just Shoot Me from a D to DD or DDD. It was insane. I mean menstrual variation aside, it was not natural. I dated a former San Antonio ballerina, who due to her prodigious breasts had to tape them down. Her's went from lasagna noodles to fully inflated fun bags once a month. That and her trim ballerina figure sent me into over drive for 7 days each month. Pam Anderson went through deflation in the last episode of her show Stacked. In every episode but that it was wall to wall mams but the last she mysteriously sported a drape and scarf. She then appeared at a gala dressed the same way, her twin blimps were no where to be seen. Then a few weeks later she shows up with a new shiny tight pair of DDs or E's. Along with these weird east west pointing nipples. Remember the straight ahead headlights she sported on the intro to Baywatch? Now the things are askew.Now, recently some young overrated actress named Scarlet Johanssen was said to have the best breasts in Hollywood. Well, I bet her plastic surgeon is tickled as pink as her aureoles. But we and she know that hers are not real So we give her a ^^ for two nice Synthetics, Si or NaCl is yet to be determined. Just go to this link to see before and after photos : http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/2093/Events/2093/ScarlettJo_Vespa_1419281_400.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Johansson,%20ScarlettSalma Hayek also rates a ^^ for Synthetics too along with three ~~~ for stretch marks she should have kept hidden. See her transformation here: http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/0366-wri/Events/0366-wri/hayeksal.ma%23?path=pgallery&path_key=Hayek,%20SalmaNo Jessica Simpson, well, if they are real, they are nice. If they are fake, they are nice. They might be synthetics based on Exhibit 2 above.Of the other entries in the recent list I'd say only Halle Berry Rebecca Romjin, Jen Love Hewitt and maybe Lindsay Lohan have naturals. Now armed with your new Exhibits, go forth and do your best breast CSI work